Getting Started

My first day as a blogger... yay! I should probably write something profound and catchy so that I can develop a group of followers who will hang on my every word, eagerly awaiting my next post. However, as usual, I'm too sleepy to think of anything like that. And, let's be honest, what percentage of blogs out there meet that criteria? I'm guessing not that many.

So, this is day five of my week from hell. My husband left us on Sunday afternoon for some work-related conference in Phoenix. Until he gets back on Saturday night, I'm here with my two kids (one is 3 1/2 and the other is 17 months old), four cats, a dog, two tanks of freshwater fish and not a shred of sanity left. I haven't really slept at all this week. My amazing, vibrating dog had a seizure early Monday morning and the rest of the nights I've had to cater to my son's night time needs - sitting potty, drinks of water and soothing night terrors. I battle insomnia as it is. Getting up in the middle of the night means I fall asleep again a couple of hours later after whatever crisis has been dealt with. It didn't help that last night my son was screaming at me that my breath was stinky. Gee, I should've thought to pop a breath mint during my sprint down the hall. Silly me.

Anyway, due to this lack of sleep I've been on the verge of tears at any given moment and my patience is nonexistent. The kids wonder where the nice mommy went to and when she'll be coming back. Coffee is my only friend. The cats are contributing to the madness by not using the litterbox and the dog is dog is redecorating the kitchen with goodies she finds in the garbage can. Yet, I love these animals and won't give them up even though my son and I are allergic to them. I must be crazy.

So, my big question for today is where did the strong, independent woman of my twenties go to? When did I become so needy and dependent on my husband? It seemed like once upon a time I could handle just about any crisis. I was going to take on the world. I was the one friends and family turned to for support. Now I'm the one who needs the help and feel like I can't function without my husband here to help out. I know that a large part of this is due to my having chronic fatigue syndrome, leaving me with an extremely low supply of energy but it's still hard to accept that. This is not where I expected to find myself at 36.